Can Men and Women Be Friends?

Whenever a man and woman are seen together, people are quick to assume that they’re a couple. Even if they were to show no signs of affection, it’s normal for people to conclude that “ah, they must be a couple.”

For the most part, if you were to see a man and a woman hugging each other and smiling, you’d think the same. But if they were to tell you that they were just friends, would you believe them?

There’s a saying that goes “Men are from Mars and women are from Venus.”, which is a way of saying that men and women think differently from each other.

Most of the time, when a man befriends a woman, there’s always going to be an ulterior motive. Guys don’t usually approach women they aren’t interested in. If they happen to be friends, it’s mostly because they’re in the same social circle.

If a guy tries to befriend a woman, she’ll sometimes say “I have a boyfriend” even if it’s not true.

Some men see this as obnoxious behavior. But if you think about it, they have no idea what goes on in a woman’s life that leads them to respond this way.

And this is where the differences lie.

Women experience life a lot more differently than men do. No matter how hard you try to ignore gender, it does matter.

In the same way, men are also expected to live up as “manly men.” They have to appear uber-masculine in order to gain the approval of their peers.

This clash of mindsets can make it hard to befriend the opposite gender. However, it isn’t impossible.

Contrary to what most people think, men and women CAN be friends. Here’s an example:

Frank is an extroverted guy. He has friends from all walks of life. He has a few female friends as well. He doesn’t make moves on any one of them. Instead, he sees them as casual friends he can have great conversations with.

If you were Frank, would you make advances to all these women who walk into your life? Absolutely not. If he did, he wouldn’t have these female friends in the first place.

Women are very careful with the men who they call their friends. They put them through some sort of silent test to properly understand their character. If they are:

a) Respectful of their boundaries and differences

b) Empathetic

Then they are most likely going to befriend the guy. That is, of course, if there’s no attraction involved.

Which leads us to the main reason why it IS possible for men and women to be friends: lack of attraction.

People are NOT going to jump at every single member of the opposite gender they come across. It’s why dating exists in the first place — to get to know if the person you’re dating is actually interesting to you.

What’s more, decent men exist. They are admittedly rare for some women, but it is still possible to find men who were raised with good values.

Those who have negative views towards women are often the ones that approach them with ulterior motives. These are the ones that most women are very wary of.

The bottom line is, you can be casual friends with the opposite gender. It may be hard to understand each other from time to time. With respect and empathy towards each other, this friendship can still work.