Why Modern Feminism is Killing Romance: A Woman’s Perspective
Has modern feminism contributed to the decline of romance in modern society?
Now, before you jump to conclusions, let me be clear. I am a staunch advocate for gender equality and women’s rights, and I firmly believe that feminism has done and continues to do important work in promoting social justice and dismantling oppressive systems.
However, when it comes to matters of the heart, I believe that the tenets of this movement have led to a pervasive sense of cynicism and distrust that is killing the romantic spirit that we all crave.
Why? Hear me out.
Modern feminism has led to individualism.
One of the key tenets of modern feminism is the idea that women should be empowered to make their own choices and not be held back by traditional gender roles or societal expectations.
Now, you may be asking: Why is this a bad thing?
When individualism is taken to an extreme (which is where we are headed as a society right now) it can be a barrier to forming meaningful relationships.
An individualistic person is going to heavily focus on their own needs, desires, and goals, and may not be able to empathize with or understand their partner’s perspective. They may also have a hard time compromising or sacrificing for the sake of the relationship.
In the end, these people choose themselves over others, making it hard for them to be in committed relationships.
Self-advocacy is destroying relationships.
Assertiveness and self-advocacy that is so central to modern feminism sometimes create an adversarial dynamic in romantic relationships.
When both partners are fiercely independent and focused on advocating for themselves, it can create a dynamic where each person is constantly trying to assert their dominance and maintain control.
As a result, arguments and disagreements arise, as both individuals are unwilling to compromise or give up ground.
Ultimately, this creates a sense of distrust and hostility that is antithetical to the open-hearted vulnerability and mutual respect that is necessary for true romance to thrive.
The push for gender equality has led to the rejection of romantic gestures.
The emphasis on gender equality and the fight against gender-based oppression has sometimes led to a dismissal or outright rejection of traditional gender roles and romantic gestures.
The idea that men should be chivalrous or engage in grand romantic gestures is often seen as outdated, while the notion that women should be demure and submissive is rightfully criticized as being regressive and harmful.
However, in the process of rejecting these traditional gender roles, we have also thrown out the baby with the bathwater, so to speak.
Romance is not about perpetuating gender stereotypes or enforcing power imbalances, it is about expressing vulnerability, openness, and love.
What can we do to revive romance?
In relationships, we should strive to create a connection that is built on mutual trust, empathy, and respect.
Instead of prioritizing our individual desires and goals above all else, we should be willing to open ourselves up to our partners, share our fears and insecurities, and work together towards common goals.
In the end, we should find a way to balance our commitment to gender equality and social justice with our fundamental human desire for intimacy and connection.
By doing so, we can create relationships that are both fulfilling and empowering, and that honor the complex and multifaceted nature of who we are as individuals and as members of a larger society.
Feminism is great, but extremist behavior is not. Let’s try to find balance.
