“Men Dating While They’re Broke Is Just Risky Business”
On Anthony O’Neal and Stephan Speaks’ discussion about dating when broke
As a man, if you’re broke whether you’re living with your parents or anywhere, that’s a problem.
This is what Stephan Speaks has said on a YouTube video with Anthony O’neal, the man behind The Table With AO channel.
He was firm in his statement that a man should be financially stable before he starts dating. He doesn’t need to be rich, but he must have the ability to provide and care for himself.
He also added that broke people should not be focused on finding a partner, but rather focus their energy on establishing themselves.
And as a woman, I couldn’t agree more.
Not because I’m a gold digger, but because I know that dating a broke person can have serious consequences for both parties.
You can be taken advantage of
Speaks also mentioned that he’s seen many situations where a woman only got together with a broke man because she was going to have power over him.
I see what he means. I, too, know someone who’s living paycheck to paycheck and had a long-distance relationship with a rich woman who could buy both of their wants and needs.
But he couldn’t express his opinions nor make a decision in their relationship because his partner always had the upper hand. She constantly intimidated him and made him feel like he was nothing without her.
He even suspected that the woman was seeing another guy, but was just refusing to leave him because she enjoyed having power and control over their relationship.
You will be treated as a “project”
If you start off not being the financially stable one and that woman is financially stable or successful, whether she wants to admit it or not, you are a project.
You are a child in her eyes that she is going to raise into a man. And some women may say “I’m not looking at him like that”, but subconsciously you are. You’re viewing him as someone I have to mold or build or get there, Speaks emphasized.
And this hit me hard. If a woman thinks of you this way, do you think she genuinely loves you? Do you think she will ever see you as an equal?
To maintain a respectful relationship, your partner should see you as their equal, emphasizing that neither of you has more authority in the relationship.
So if they think you’re not capable of handling yourself, it’s just a matter of time before they lose respect for you.
I’m not saying that money is the only way you’ll earn respect, but if you enter a relationship without it, to reiterate, you will likely be treated as a project.
Be financially ready
I think financial stability is one of the most underrated aspects of relationships.
We often tell ourselves that we should be mentally and emotionally prepared before entering into relationships, but the matter of being financially equipped is just tossed aside.
If you can’t survive on your own, I’m sorry, but I have to agree with Speaks that men dating while they’re broke is just risky business.
